How to Build Confidence and Self-Esteem?
Building confidence and self-esteem takes time and practice. Here are some strategies:
1. Build on past achievements
You need to reflect on what you have accomplished so far and what were the key goals, objectives, and milestones from your professional and personal life. Your achievement log, containing results that you are most proud of, is a compelling narrative about your capabilities.
Celebrate wins to showcase your progress in the right direction and recognize your growth.
2. Build on your strengths
Emphasize your strengths, skills, and abilities, and remind them often. Know what your weaknesses are. Self-awareness is key to self-confidence.
You can also mentor others that are less experienced to pass on knowledge. Giving back builds credibility.
You might use a SWOT analysis to review your key strengths and how to take advantage of opportunities that might arise in the future.
Such analysis might help with your understanding of where you can build on, where which skills you should double down, and the areas where you should set goals for the long term.
Once you know where your strengts are you will be able to get out of your confort zone, by stepping up on the opportunities. Growth takes place outside of the confort zone.
3. Set and achieve goals
Start with small, achievable goals and gradually tackle bigger challenges. Each success will boost your confidence.
We've expanded this topic into a 7-step framework on setting and achieving goals.
4. Learn new skills
Acquiring new abilities or honing existing ones can increase your self-esteem and make you feel competent.
Step out of your comfort zone. You might be interested in getting certified in your field, finalizing an online course, or organizing your workshop. Such challenges are significant personal milestones; however, they will help you be more confident about your abilities and do bigger things in the future.
Read books, or listen to podcasts. Another way to increase your confidence is to read confidence and self-esteem books and listen to guests covering these topics.
Also, make time for new hobbies and try new things you're passionate about.
5. Positive self-talk
Positive thoughts should be used to replace negative ones. Encourage yourself as you would a friend.
When you reach a difficulty, be kind to yourself, and don't think about failure.
Embrace your failures and view them as learning opportunities. Think about this famous quote from Churchill: Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
6. Practice self-care
Build habits that boost confidence. Exercise on a regular basis, have a balanced diet, and enough sleep to enhance your mood and energy levels, boosting self-confidence.
Stop comparing yourself to others. You might be interested in doing this as is natural, however, doing it can be dangerous and confidence-consuming. What we recomend you should do is to compare yourself with your better version, and reflect about the steps that will lead you there.
It is also a good practice to say no to unreasonable requests.
7. Surround yourself with positivity
When you feel too overwhelmed, it's better to stop, reflect on the situation, and eventually get a second unbiased opinion.
Seek supportive and positive individuals who encourage and believe in you.
Remember: Past experiences don't dictate the future.
8. Become an expert in your field
Being very good at a specific subject will boost your confidence because you know you will have the answers to the difficult questions you will receive.
Track your progress on a big project you're working on. Maybe it's an exhibition, restoring a car, or building a small fruit farm. Plan everything, create a roadmap, discuss with colleagues that are specialized on those kind of tasks, and start working on your main initiative. Use a tool like Asana, Notion or Todoist to track your progress, keep momentum, and boost motivation.
9. Develop a solid personal brand
If you put energy and effort over time into showing up authentically, delivering value, and connecting with your community, you can build a trusted personal brand. Here are some additional tips: identify your strengths and start creating content consistently in this area of expertise. You might begin with X-Twitter or Facebook; however, to capture more opportunities, expand on YouTube, TikTok, and Instagram. Go for speaking engagements and write guest blog posts.
Remember, becoming an expert is a long-term endeavor and takes tremendous time—some ten years or 10,000 hours of practice, as Malcolm Gladwell points out.
10. Get expert support
If none of the above work for you, maybe it's time to speak with a counselor or psychologist to help you get a tailored program to get you back.
Top Quotes About Confidence
1. "Believe you can and you're halfway there." - Theodore Roosevelt
2. "Confidence is what we get when we take fear, face it and replace it." - Tim Fargo
3. "To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
4. "Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong." - Peter T. Mcintyre
5. "You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face." - Eleanor Roosevelt
6. "With confidence, you have won before you have started." - Marcus Garvey
7. "I can't think of any better representation of beauty than someone who is unafraid to be herself." - Emma Stone
8. "The man who does not value himself, cannot value anything or anyone." - Ayn Rand
9. "Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do." - Benjamin Spock
10. "Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage." - Dale Carnegie
11. "Confidence isn't thinking you're better than anyone else, it's realizing that you have no reason to compare yourself to anyone else." - Maryam Hasnaa
12. "Confidence is not, 'They will like me'. Confidence is, 'I'll be fine if they don't'." - Christina Grimmie
13. "Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage, and confidence in the doing." - Theodore Roosevelt
14. "Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle." - Christian D. Larson
15. "Don't wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles, and less than perfect conditions. So what? Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident, and more and more successful." - Mark Victor Hansen
16. "Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence." - Helen Keller
17. "The way to develop self-confidence is to do the thing you fear and get a record of successful experiences behind you." - William James
18. "If you are insecure, guess what? The rest of the world is, too. Do not overestimate the competition and underestimate yourself. You are better than you think." - T. Harv Eker
19. "I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear." – Nelson Mandela
20. "Confidence comes from hours and days and weeks and years of constant work and dedication." - Roger Staubach
21. "Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy."– Norman Vincent Peale
22. "If you think you can do a thing or think you can't do a thing, you're right." - Henry Ford
23. "Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life." - Golda Meir
24. "The only time you fail is when you fall down and stay down." - Stephen Richards
25. "Confidence is contagious. So is lack of confidence." - Vince Lombardi
26. "Confidence doesn't come from being right all the time, but from not fearing to be wrong." - Unknown
27. "Because one believes in oneself, one doesn't try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn't need others' approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her. " - Lao Tzu
28. "Success is most often achieved by those who don't know that failure is inevitable. " - Coco Chanel
29. "The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt. " - Sylvia Plath
30. "A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him. " - David Brinkley
Top 15 Self-Confidence Skills
Here is our top self-confidence skills list. This list can be longer; however, we believe that the hard and soft skills mentioned below are a solid basis for someone who wants to be more confident:
- Self-awareness: Practice mindfulness and reflection to understand your strengths and weaknesses.
- Assertiveness: Stand up for your rights and express your feelings and beliefs in a non-offensive, honest way.
- Positive thinking: Cultivate an optimistic outlook, practice gratitude, and employ positive self-talk.
- Goal setting: Set SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound) goals and work towards achieving them.
- Resilience: Learn from failures and setbacks. Use them as stepping stones to success.
- Emotional intelligence: Understand and manage your emotions and those of others.
- Communication skills: Practice active listening and clear, confident speech (effective communication).
- Public speaking: Join a public speaking group or course to improve your skills.
- Body language: Maintain good posture and eye contact to project confidence.
- Stress management: Learn stress management techniques like deep breathing, yoga, or meditation.
- Self-care: Prioritize physical health with good nutrition, exercise, and sleep.
- Networking: Attend events and socialize. Networking can boost your confidence.
- Empathy: Try to understand others' perspectives. This can build your emotional intelligence and confidence.
- Continuous learning: Always be open to new experiences and opportunities to learn.
- Self-efficacy: Belief in your ability to influence your own life. Take small steps to start seeing positive outcomes from your actions.
Here's a table comparing the characteristics of confident and insecure people:
|Characteristic||Confident People||Insecure People|
|Body Language||Open and relaxed||Closed and tense|
|Risk-taking||Willing to take risks||Avoids risks|
|Acceptance of Criticism||Open to feedback||Defensive|
Please note that these characteristics are generalizations and can vary from person to person. It's also important to remember that confidence and insecurity exist on a spectrum, and individuals may exhibit different traits at different times or contexts.
What Is a Confident Person?
A confident person believes in their abilities and communicates this belief to others. They're assertive without being arrogant and not afraid to take risks. Confident people are comfortable with themselves, accept their weaknesses, and know how to leverage their strengths. They stand up for their values and are not easily swayed by others' opinions.
- Confidence is a belief in oneself: It's about understanding your own strengths and abilities and being able to convey this to others.
- Confidence can be developed: It's not a fixed attribute. You can build it over time through self-awareness, goal setting, and positive thinking, among other strategies.
- Confidence is key to success: Confidence can improve performance, resilience, relationships, happiness, and leadership abilities.
- Confidence and arrogance are not the same: Confidence stems from self-respect and positivity, while arrogance is based on self-importance and negativity.
- Confidence is about balance: It's not about ignoring your flaws but recognizing them alongside your strengths. This balanced self-perception helps you move forward with realism and optimism.